Why is the floor moving? OR Let the war begin!

Let me just start by saying that I LOATHE public showers. 

I am a slight germaphobe; for instance, if I drop a cookie on the floor I enforce a “2 second rule” rather than a “5 second rule.” The only way I would feel comfortable using a public shower, were if I scrubbed it down first with a disinfectant. The shower curtains are the worst. The minute you shut the water off it creates a vacuum effect which sucks the filthy, raggedy drape of plastic inward to cling onto your freshly cleansed body. Never fails. 

Okay, I am ranting. Boo hoo. Put on your big girl panties and just deal with it, right? Alright then.

As we are trading God’s beautiful nature, for sewage hook-ups, we must do our duty and do our big dooties (well not BIG, necessarily, but our dooty-dooty) and our showers in the campground bathroom to save room in our RV tanks.

It had gotten to the point where the flies were buzzing around me more than the dog, so I figured it was time to give in and go use the campground shower. <<shivers>>

I loaded up my supplies and headed over, through the obstacle course that nature in the dessert provides and I arrived, without cacti attached or scorpion stings. Pat myself on the back - I am getting good at this!

On the advice of my husband, I entered the handicap shower...He had seen me pack my razor and knows full well that if I don’t have a place to sit whilst I shave my legs, I will end up doing the splits onto the shower floor, not voluntarily of course.

I opened the door to find a large, private room with its own sink, a cement floor with two drains, two hooks by the shower stall for hanging your ‘whatevers’, and two benches; one outside the stall for dressing and one inside the stall for shaving. Ugh, I looked at the shower bench and imagined a gazillion dirty butt prints . . . never mind, I’ll use my electric razor when I get back to the rig. 

I got myself all set up. I had my clothes laid out in the order that I would be putting them on, had my hair towel and bath towel hanging on the hooks; hair towel closer as I would need it first, and my shower gear set up in the shower stall itself. Let’s get this over with.

Flip-flops on, of course, I enter the shower. It had a hose that I could take down off the wall, so I was happy with that, as well as the fact that there was no shower curtain! Yay!

Waited for the water to warm up, it never did, so I began my cold shower. No grumbling from me though. What’s the point if there’s no one around to hear it?

I had washed my hair and bent over to put the conditioner in when I noticed the floor moving. My first thought was, crap – I’m going to faint, until my eyes focused and I realized it was not the floor moving, but spiders, the same color as the floor, fleeing the wet area I was standing on. As one ran across my foot I screamed (didn’t care that no one was listening) and grabbed the shower nozzle. I sprayed and sprayed and SPRAYED! Those dang spiders would not die; they just kept getting back up and running.

I grabbed a flip-flop from my foot and began smacking them until there was nothing moving. Hopping around on one flip-flop, on a slippery wet cement floor - chasing spiders that were much faster than me was no easy feat, but I killed them all. I am completely amazed I didn't slip and crack my head open. (Now I sound like my mother).

Just proves spiders have no brains. If only they had all turned and charged toward me, they would have won that war!

I had enough of this shower business. I rinsed the conditioner out of my hair, gave my body the ole once over and shut off the water. Stepping out to dry off I got my first real look at the ‘war zone’. This was a big room and not an inch of it was dry…including my towels and the clothing I was to change into. <pout>

Oh well, I won the war and that’s all that counted. <mental victory dance> I donned my wet clothes and headed for the rig . . . We’ll see how long I can last before Mark drags me back to that shower...we'll be here for another week.

At least I won't be hairy! <wink>